Tonight, alone with my laptop, I now have a chance to give myself a pep talk. I always do this as part of my nightly Reflections. After all as an Orthodox Catholic, it's something the Bible and the Church Fathers would have anyone do if she fears she's falling into sin.
I am a very proud person. I am ashamed of it. And part of that PRIDE is anger, sometimes irrational anger that accumulates to rage. It is only by the grace of God that I have been kept in control of my own emotions. I have to admit too that my pride stems from my unfailing short-comings as a person; my insecurities have been overbearing that most of the time I have to maintain a facade of a carefree, intellectually superior person. I do have a knack for the Geeky, but that's just as far as it goes; the rest are general information.
Am I being brutal to myself? Of course. There's no other option for me but bitter honesty. I have nothing to offer other people; in short, I'm a bland, uninteresting person that cares too much for her soul and for the others. They could care less if I really cared.
I guess, as I study deep the Orthodox faith, that if we are to get close to God, we have no other choice but for ourselves to be stripped naked by Him. All our pretexts and pretensions, through the loving Act of God, are thrown out of the window until we finally realize that our nakedness is what God is after... Just like when Adam and Eve were naked and unashamed.
Now what is anger? The Bible talks of Righteous anger but it is the domain of God. Christ talks of anger as equal to murder. The Church Fathers teach that Anger is an unnatural trait of human beings. Here is a helpful quote:
"Anger's true origin lies within us, in our own passions. Saint Nilus the Ascetic says that anger is akin to gluttony; both result from our craving for personal physical pleasure and psychological self-satisfaction. When these yearnings are thwarted, however trivial the desired object may be, we become angry.
Even more frequently, anger springs from injured pride. Saint Maximos says, "whatever a man loves he clings to, and in order not to lose it rejects everything that keeps him from it." Although Saint Maximos recognized "self-love" as "the mother of the passions," he accuses it of being the particular cause of "anger, irritation, rancor, and so on." The Scriptures too link anger with pride, as we see in Proverbs 29:22-23: "A man of wrath stirs up strife, and a man given to anger causes much transgression. A man's pride will bring him low, but he who is lowly in spirit will obtain honor."Undoubtedly, Anger is rooted on Pride. The feeling of anger makes us susceptible into believing that we could be MORE than other people; we could be more than ourselves, we could be MORE than God. Anger is a shell of self deceit, it doesn't really help our well- being. One might say, "But isn't anger, a natural emotion?". Well, my answer must be based on what the Church Fathers and what the Scriptures tell us: in our fallen state, anger has become natural, but this wasn't so in the original design of God on mankind.
What should be done then? God has given us the antidote against anger and pride. In Orthodoxy, it is through prayers, meditation, reflection and participation in the Divine Liturgy celebrated in His Church. It is through these that we melt whatever armor of deceit and pride we have built for ourselves. God's antidote REQUIRES our active participation in His Holy Mysteries, until, step by painful step, we are stripped right to the soul and all anger and pride fade away.
LORD JESUS CHRIST, SON OF GOD, HAVE MERCY ON ME, A SINNER...
Quoted from: http://www.orthodoxresearchinstitute.org/articles/misc/cozby_anger.htm
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